Why am I going to Nunavut?
While it is not easy to give a crap-free answer to casual acquaintances, it's even tougher to convince people who think they know me well that 1. no I am not crazy and 2. seriously, I am not crazy! For the past how many weeks I have found myself loving those who right off the bat simply say that they are happy for me and they wish me well. Even if some of them are just saying it because they really don't care where I am going or they have no idea where Nunavut is, they have made my life a lot easier by not letting me have to explain myself. That's one reason why I chose not to talk about my plan (except to my family and very few close friends) - I don't want the noise of other people's opinions and questions drown out that little voice that's telling me to take this major leap of faith towards the north. I know, I'm trying too hard to sound Steve Jobish like with my musings - I just finished reading his biography and am still having little hang over from that.
Yes the pay is good and the work experience is great but if that's all there is to it, it wouldn't justify at all my having to extract myself from my just recently built comfort zone. Although I would be a hypocrite if I say that the practical aspect was not a part of the equation but it merely served as additional nourishment to a seed that has already been planted. A lot of people may not know it but I have always relied on my intuition when having to make major decisions. I agree with the late Steve Jobs when he said that "intuition is greater than intelligence". There is some check and balance, however, between who I really am, in essence and my upbringing that keeps me grounded. So when my interest on venturing up north was aroused, the often ignored practical and reality bound part of me told me that I was crazy. And that could have been the end of it. But then earlier this year I faced a sort of financial bump and team intuition grabbed the chance to use this unfortunate, though not necessarily earth shattering event, as a strong argument for their cause. That I should go north. Again, like all my intuition based decisions, as soon as I took the first tiny step to making it happen, things just started to fall into place.
But again, why?
Maybe I need to be somewhere that would lead me towards the core of who I really am. When I find myself stripped of all the trivial and nonsensical concerns, the dramas and all the other trappings of life and where layered clothing's the only layering I'll ever need, when I have to go back to the basics and rely on my survival instinct and when I am in a place so vast that I am confronted by how small I really am in the greater scheme of things...maybe, just maybe, the north can bring me a step closer to understanding who I am and my purpose for being. And isn't that what life is really all about in the first place?
I know that I sound like I am romanticizing something that requires a lot of planning, strategy and sound judgment. I know that it is naive and even foolish of me to talk about this when I am not even in Nunavut yet. But at this point in my life, my intuition has already attained a track record that I am willing to trust. For the longest time and through every different phases of my life it has gently whispered to me that I should not be afraid of starting over. Always. And that has been the recurring theme of my life - starting all over. Because of this I've had the opportunity to experience a lot of things I would never have experienced if I stuck with a single, safe formula. I may never know what it feels like to reach the top of the ladder but I get to run in a vast open field! I may have my limitations as a person but I make sure that my life experiences are not limited.
While it is not easy to give a crap-free answer to casual acquaintances, it's even tougher to convince people who think they know me well that 1. no I am not crazy and 2. seriously, I am not crazy! For the past how many weeks I have found myself loving those who right off the bat simply say that they are happy for me and they wish me well. Even if some of them are just saying it because they really don't care where I am going or they have no idea where Nunavut is, they have made my life a lot easier by not letting me have to explain myself. That's one reason why I chose not to talk about my plan (except to my family and very few close friends) - I don't want the noise of other people's opinions and questions drown out that little voice that's telling me to take this major leap of faith towards the north. I know, I'm trying too hard to sound Steve Jobish like with my musings - I just finished reading his biography and am still having little hang over from that.
Yes the pay is good and the work experience is great but if that's all there is to it, it wouldn't justify at all my having to extract myself from my just recently built comfort zone. Although I would be a hypocrite if I say that the practical aspect was not a part of the equation but it merely served as additional nourishment to a seed that has already been planted. A lot of people may not know it but I have always relied on my intuition when having to make major decisions. I agree with the late Steve Jobs when he said that "intuition is greater than intelligence". There is some check and balance, however, between who I really am, in essence and my upbringing that keeps me grounded. So when my interest on venturing up north was aroused, the often ignored practical and reality bound part of me told me that I was crazy. And that could have been the end of it. But then earlier this year I faced a sort of financial bump and team intuition grabbed the chance to use this unfortunate, though not necessarily earth shattering event, as a strong argument for their cause. That I should go north. Again, like all my intuition based decisions, as soon as I took the first tiny step to making it happen, things just started to fall into place.
But again, why?
Maybe I need to be somewhere that would lead me towards the core of who I really am. When I find myself stripped of all the trivial and nonsensical concerns, the dramas and all the other trappings of life and where layered clothing's the only layering I'll ever need, when I have to go back to the basics and rely on my survival instinct and when I am in a place so vast that I am confronted by how small I really am in the greater scheme of things...maybe, just maybe, the north can bring me a step closer to understanding who I am and my purpose for being. And isn't that what life is really all about in the first place?
I know that I sound like I am romanticizing something that requires a lot of planning, strategy and sound judgment. I know that it is naive and even foolish of me to talk about this when I am not even in Nunavut yet. But at this point in my life, my intuition has already attained a track record that I am willing to trust. For the longest time and through every different phases of my life it has gently whispered to me that I should not be afraid of starting over. Always. And that has been the recurring theme of my life - starting all over. Because of this I've had the opportunity to experience a lot of things I would never have experienced if I stuck with a single, safe formula. I may never know what it feels like to reach the top of the ladder but I get to run in a vast open field! I may have my limitations as a person but I make sure that my life experiences are not limited.
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